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Healing Deeply - Where do I start?

Before we can address a problem in our life, we first have to recognize that we have a problem, and often problems become noticeable within our relationships. We begin to feel alone, sad, unloved, isolated, all of which then can trigger a vicious cycle of self-doubt, lack of interest/confidence, and insecurities. I've borrowed some helpful tips through some online research for healing deeply. Here is what I have to offer, however, please keep in mind that we have life/health cycles, relationship cycles, and growth/maturity cycles. Though we successfully work through one relationship, we can experience a new cycle with another relationship, just keep a reminder of the practice below close by. Eventually this practice becomes a habit, and you won't need me! I'll be here of course, just in case.

Keep in mind that eating healthy (shake the sugar & bad carbs), get at least 7-8 hours of sleep each night (turn off technology that will wake you up), exercise, walking is exercise ;0), seeing your Doc and taking your prescribed meds consistently will keep you on track, and don't forget pampering goes a long way to healing, get that massage, Pedi/Mani, and seek support when feeling that things are just not working. There is help on the way, just lean into it!

Acknowledge your problems. Often, the first step to healing is realizing that there is a problem. If you have suffered a loss or are going through a major life change, you may be dealing with some form of anxiety or depression. Many people let mental health issues go untreated, because they feel they are not "real" problems. Remember healing yourself emotionally can be just as important as healing an obvious injury, such as a broken leg. In my personal experience however, anxiety was much more difficult to treat because you really have to work on creative ways to help yourself through this, and you can't just put a cast on it!

  • Take an emotional inventory. Keep a journal that tracks your thoughts and emotions. Do you see patterns? Finding the reason for discomfort is a good place to start healing.

  • If your body has gone through a physical trauma or illness, your mental health can suffer, too. Recognize that in order to heal your body, you need to help your mind heal.

  • Talk about your feelings. It can be very therapeutic to express yourself. Ask a trusted friend if she has time to talk or seek a mental health professional.

Take steps to improve your situation. There are several steps you can take to help yourself mentally heal. If you know the reason that you are not emotionally well, you can change your situation. If you are healing from an illness, for example, reach out to your doctor to talk about your mental health symptoms. Then, work with them to create a plan of action. Taking the first steps toward addressing the reasons you're struggling may help you feel less anxious.

  • If you need to heal from a traumatic emotional situation, try to establish some order in your life. If you are suffering the loss of a loved one, for instance, follow a routine to help you remember to eat, bathe, and check in with people who care about you.

  • Perhaps you need to heal from a rough patch in your career. Stabilize your situation by actively accelerating your search for a new job. Do not bad mouth or gossip about this, it only takes you down a sad path of its everyone else's fault.

  • Get a support system. Surround yourself with family and friends who are supportive. Explain that you need their companionship and ask them to spend a little extra time with you. This is where your relationships show their strength and integrity.

Reduce anxiety by doing breathing exercises and challenging negative thoughts. Feeling anxious is one of the greatest roadblocks to mental healing. Anxiety can lead to horrible uncertainty, depression, and insomnia. You can do several things to keep your anxiety levels in check, such as deep breathing exercises.

  • When you are feeling stressed, take a few minutes to focus entirely on your breath. Take deep breaths in and slowly release them. Your heart rate and your anxiety will decrease. Inhale, expand your belly, exhale pull in your belly.

  • Learn to meditate. Meditation has been shown to have profound positive impacts on mental health. To begin, find a quiet place where you can sit comfortably and clear your mind. You can download guided meditations on your smartphone or take classes. I can't say this enough, clear your head!

  • Focus on the positive. There actually is power in positive thinking. Make a list of the good things in your life. Make it a point to reflect on those things for a few minutes each day. I once had a professor who told me that I put PPT in philosophy. Hey, if it works!

Practice self-care. When you are mentally healing, self-care is the most important thing you can do for yourself. Self-care means taking time to think about your own needs and ensuring that you are giving yourself everything you need. Self-care is not selfish, it is essential.

  • Make sure you're meeting all of your basic needs. For instance, eat regular meals, drink 8-10 glasses of water, bathe, and brush your teeth every day. Once a week, clean up your living space and do your laundry. Additionally, pay your bills each month. Lack of responsibility will only have you feeling worse.

  • Self-care can also mean setting boundaries. If you have been around negative people, remove yourself from that social circle. Deeper healing will help you see where your power is. Do not let negativity take that away from you. This is where you can become untouchable, stay the course. I say a protection prayer to deflect negativity from my well-being, sort of a shield!

  • Give yourself boundaries so that you get adequate rest. For example, don't check your work e-mail late in the evening. Let your mind recharge. Boundaries are so important in life, relationships, careers, always keep in mind your moral compass, where is that GPS taking you?

  • Make sure to set aside time for yourself each day. Do something that makes you feel good, such as watching your favorite show or taking a bubble bath. Read a good book lately? Gone for a walk? Chatted on the phone with a friend? How about volunteering, it's a great way to feel better about you too!

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